The Fox and the Hen House

Once upon a time there was a fox. The fox was placed in charge of the hen house. The fox’s job was to regulate all the activity of the hen house. However, the fox was wily and was opposed to regulation. Therefore, he ate all the hens. However, this did not satisfy the fox. So, the fox invited all his friends to a meeting. When all his friends were gathered he said, “We need to guard all the hen houses in the land. If we do this we can happily eat hens forever. I propose that we buy up all the hen houses in the land. I also propose that we borrow the money to buy all the hen houses and the factory that makes money. If we do this we can make more money to borrow to buy more hen houses. We can also buy all authority in the land so we can place ourselves in charge of the hen houses. However, since we are smart we will make sure we do not eat all the hens. We must maintain a healthy population of hens. The hens must think all is well so they will be fat and juicy. We will make the hens pay taxes – their first born, while we will convince the hens that since we are the job creators we will not have to pay any taxes. However, since the hens must eat to live we will put them to work in the fields to grow grains. We will build factories to process the grain into seed. We will pay them very little but don’t worry fellow fox friends we will make them pay for their food. Between the taxes and the food, we will get all our invested money back. We will tell them this is capitalism. If we get too many working hens and we do not have enough work for them and we can’t eat them all, we will just let the excess hens die off thinking that they are lazy and do not deserve the things that working hens get. We will create wars so we can make them think we will protect them. We will make them think that the governing authority is evil and, even though we are the governing authority, we will make them think that we will protect them from the governing authority. If there are any smart chickens among them making problems we will make the majority of the hens believe that these free ranging chickens are secretly foxes in chickens clothes. We will make the hens think that we are on the side of their god, the great rooster in the sky. We will side with all their social issues like their belief that there should not be a chicken in every pot. We will make sure there are many hens for one rooster. We will make sure that we interpret the original intent of the constitution of all chickens to make sure it allows for all our ravenous goals. In the land of the chicken the fox will be king. My fellow foxes we are elite and deserve to eat dumb chickens forever.” All the foxes cheered the wily fox for his cunning and wisdom and proceeded to eat chickens for the rest of their lives and all the foxes lived happily ever after.

The End

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